Fight, Flight, Freeze: The Impact of Stress on Children and How You Can Help Them

Stress. Ugh.

It can creep up on you slowly or throw you right into the deep end. Life is full of ups and downs. Looking on the bright side of things isn’t as easy as Monty Python (Life of Brian) would have you believe.

Stress is a part of life. As much a part of it as eating and sleeping. We can’t get rid of it. What we can do is learn how to navigate these stressful moments, we can be gentle with ourselves, show ourselves compassion, return to gratitude where appropriate and of course remember to breathe.

The Breath and Stress

When we take it back to the ancient wisdom tucked away in The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali we can learn a lot about about the breath. Brace yourselves because it turns out that those wise yogis from over 5,000 years ago were onto something big—the magic of the breath.

In the Sutras, Patanjali spills the beans on how the breath can be a game-changer when your mind is busy. Focusing on that rhythmic inhale and exhale? It’s not just a chill exercise; it’s the yogic way to calm the mind and in turn calm stress within the mind and body.

Yogis are notorious for their depth of study regarding the human body and for their understanding of the relationships between the body and the mind. It’s not surprising that Patanjali knew the profound impact the breath had on the mind and ultimately, its ability to regulate the body overall.

The Yoga Sutras identify pranayama as being the tool to turn inward, this is so important when we feel chaos around us, because we can choose to come home to ourselves, we can choose to go inward.

What is Pranayama?

Pranayama, an integral component of yoga philosophy, is the practice of conscious breath control. The term “pranayama” is derived from two Sanskrit words: “prana,” meaning life force or vital energy, and “ayama,” which translates to extension or expansion.

This ancient practice emphasizes deliberate regulation of the breath to enhance the flow of prana within the body, fostering physical, mental, and spiritual well-being. Pranayama techniques encompass a range of breathing exercises, each serving specific purposes, from calming the nervous system to increasing vitality.

As we engage in intentional inhalation, exhalation, and retention, we cultivate a heightened awareness of the breath’s profound influence on overall health and inner balance.

The Impact of Stress

Stress can have a significant impact on children’s bodies and behaviour, as it activates the body’s natural stress response system, known as the “fight, flight, or freeze” response. When a child perceives a threat or experiences stress, the body releases stress hormones, such as cortisol and adrenaline. Over time, chronic stress can lead to various physical and behavioural issues.

In terms of behaviour, stress can manifest in different ways depending on how a child copes with it. Some children may exhibit “fight” responses, becoming more aggressive, irritable, or confrontational. Others may lean towards “flight” responses, showing signs of restlessness, distractibility, or avoidance. Lastly, some children may adopt a “freeze” response, becoming withdrawn, anxious, or seeming emotionally shut down.

The impact on the body is multifaceted. Chronic stress can disrupt the natural balance of the nervous system, affecting key areas of the brain responsible for emotional regulation, attention, and decision-making. This dysregulation can lead to difficulties in concentration, impulse control, and emotional expression. Prolonged stress may contribute to physical symptoms such as headaches, stomach-aches, and sleep disturbances.

Understanding that children’s behaviour often serves as a communication tool for their internal experiences, particularly the state of their nervous systems, highlights the importance of addressing stressors and promoting healthy coping mechanisms. Creating a supportive environment that acknowledges and addresses stress helps children build resilience and develop effective strategies for navigating life’s challenges.

Where do we start with children?

Honestly, we start in the same place we do with adults – with breath awareness. We start with paying attention to our breath, noticing its rhythm and noticing the relationship between our breath, our body, our emotions and the world around us. We can start to notice how our breath changes when we feel different ways (including when we are feeling stressed). We can then notice how our body feels when we intentionally use the breath to regulate our body.

Sometimes we do this without even noticing. Ever felt really sad and let out a big sigh? Ever felt shocked and gasped? Our breath often communicates how we feel. When we start to pay attention, it can really be life changing.

After breath awareness, we move on to some fun practice to control the breath. We can do this playfully with visualizations such as Balloon breathing, and tracing hand breath. We can practice blowing our candles (real or imaginary). There are so many ways to introduce breath work to children and encouraging them to build on this awareness of the breath. Something that will serve them well now and as they get older.

Practice

This week keep a journal with your child. In it write (or draw) how your breath changes when you feel different ways. Reflect on the day and different emotions you both felt that day. What was your breath like in those moments?

Next Step

Grab your Free Game Pack!

Summing things up

In this post I shared about the relationship between stress and the breath, what we can learn from the Yoga Sutras, what Pranayama is, and how we can help children build a connection with their breath.

Remember to download your free game guide!