5 Habits I Had to Drop to Finally Feel Regulated (and Parent the Way I Wanted To)

If you’ve ever looked calm on the outside but felt like you were crumbling on the inside… you’re in the right place. Because that was me — for years.

And stay tuned until the end where I’ll share the one shift that made all the difference — and how you can make it too, starting tomorrow morning.

Read or watch:

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I’m Natasha, a family yoga teacher and parent tapping coach, and I’ve helped hundreds of families build emotional resilience through nervous system care, yoga and mindfulness — for kids and their grown-ups.

But I didn’t get here because I was naturally calm.
In fact, I spent years looking calm while actually suppressing everything I felt.

I was the one who smiled through heartbreak.
Who held it together while spiralling inside.
Who was praised for being “good under pressure” — when really, I just didn’t feel safe enough to fall apart.

So today I’m sharing the five habits I had to drop to finally feel regulated and show up as the parent I always wanted to be.

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1. Pretending I was okay when I wasn’t

I used to believe that being calm meant keeping everything inside.
Smiling at customers even when I just had the worse phone call of my life. Not being able to grief a friend because another friend didn’t want me to ruin the party.
Taking care of others while completely ignoring myself and how I was feeling.

But regulation isn’t about pretending — it’s about feeling and processing safely.
And that started with being honest with myself.

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2. Trying to be the “perfect” parent

I was drowning in guilt.
I thought if I yelled, I failed. If I was snappy, I wasn’t good enough.
But striving for perfection only made me more dysregulated.

Now? I’m calmer without forcing it. If I’m snappy, I apologize. I focus on repair. On self-compassion. On showing up with care, not perfection.

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3. Bottling up my emotions

In my teen years and early adulthood, I learned to bottle everything up.
Because when I did show emotion, it was often dismissed or shut down. I got into relationships that were highly toxic and I put up with things I would a million percent run from today.

It seemed easier to not show any emotion, not even privately. And it worked… for a while. Until the bottle overflowed.

My Yoga, Tapping and the energy work I was doing gave me a way to release those emotions gently.
Not all at once. Not dramatically. Just little by little, each day.

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4. Thinking I had to do it all alone

I used to be fiercely independent. I still am actually.
But I am working on it. Because I didn’t realise how much I needed support.

Working with coaches, showing up for tapping calls, letting myself be vulnerable — those were game changers. Letting someone else in – that was really hard for me. It’s something I am still working on because I have built some very high walls. But I have learned this….
You don’t have to carry this alone. Truly.

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5. Waiting until things were calm to start caring for myself

I kept telling myself, “I’ll do something for me… when things settle down.”
Spoiler: They didn’t.

Now, I have a daily 5 to 10-minute tapping practice. It’s short. It’s simple. But it works.

It helps me show up calmer before the chaos begins.
Because the truth is, if we wait for peace to take care of ourselves — we’ll be waiting forever.

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The Game-Changer?

I created a simple 4-part framework:
Soothing. Releasing. Being. Expanding.

We use this inside Regulate and Rise, my 28-day nervous system support program.
It’s designed to help you regulate in real-time — so you can finally stop snapping, stop feeling guilty, stop supressing, and start showing up the way you truly want to.

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CALL TO ACTION:

🌀 If you’re ready to feel grounded, calm, and actually enjoy parenting again…
✨ Join us inside Regulate and Rise — we start June 2nd.

It’s just 8 minutes a day.
For 28 days.
With weekly live calls, a bedtime reset, and a community that gets it.

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Thanks for reading today’s blog on 5 habits I had to drop to finally feel regulated. If you found this helpful, make sure to join the free Mindful Parenting Hub where I go live every Monday with new practices and stories.

Your nervous system deserves this.
And so do you.

Want to start tapping today? Check out this beautiful morning practice: